


Hold On

by CordeliaOllivander



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Auror Neville Longbottom, Azkaban, Boys In Love, Caretaking, Domestic Fluff, Flashbacks, Fluff and Smut, Friendship/Love, Gay Sex, Healing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:07:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29044353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CordeliaOllivander/pseuds/CordeliaOllivander
Summary: If the Dark Mark on his arm wasn’t enough to throw him in prison, his confession was. No one seemed to care who he had killed though. He thought about that often, all these days inside his cell, and no one had asked him. Not once.The solid metal door was cold to the touch and even with Neville being fully clothed he was freezing. When the guard opened the door, he was not prepared for what he saw. “Did you know he was like this? He could be dead tomorrow!” He screamed.He would give Theo better than this.He would give Theo everything.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Neville Longbottom/Theodore Nott
Comments: 12
Kudos: 104





	Hold On

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a hot minute!
> 
> Theodore Nott was voted "Death Eater of the Month" on a wonderful FB page I belong to, Death Eater Groupies, and I couldn't let this month go by without writing something for my otp. This story has all my favorites! A little sad, a little mad, a lot of love and some shameless smut. Please enjoy!

__

_I pull you in to feel your heartbeat_   
_Can you hear me screaming? Please don't leave me_

_Hold on, I still want you_   
_Come back, I still need you_   
_Let me take your hand, I'll make it right_   
_I swear to love you all my life_   
_Hold on, I still need you_

_Hold On_

_Chord Overstreet_

Theo tried to keep track of the days in the beginning, despite the lack of a window in his cell. _One sleep. Two sleeps. Three...  
_  
He tried to keep his mind occupied, so he recited transfiguration laws. _You cannot make something out of nothing. Water is an exception, due to the water making spell._ He didn’t dare speak the incantation aloud.  
  
He drew runes on the stone floor. _Unicorn, one. Graphorn, two. Runespoor, three._  
  
He listed off potion’s ingredients repeatedly. _Drought of living Death: Infusion of Wormwood. Powdered Root of Asphodel. Stir twice clockwise._  
  
He tried to practice wand movements, but the cuff on his wrist shocked the hell out of him the first time he tried that, so he’d learned his lesson.  
  
Looking back he shouldn’t have been so surprised that he was rounded up and thrown into Azkaban immediately following the end of the final battle. He’d stood in the crumbled courtyard of Hogwarts, covered in blood, fist clenching his wand. When the Auror that “interviewed” him asked if he had killed anyone, Theo answered honestly.  
  
 _Yes._  
  
If the Dark Mark on his arm wasn’t enough to throw him in prison, his confession was. No one seemed to care who he had killed though. He thought about that often, all these days inside his cell, and no one had asked him. Not once.  
  
Each wall had forty-two stones.  
  
He received two meals a day. The tray magically appeared in the same spot on the floor; three stones in, four down, without fail. It reminded him of the Great Hall and the way the food just appeared on their house tables.  
  
He hardly ever ate it.  
  
Try as he might, he could not track the dementors. He didn’t know if it was the same one, or how long they stayed. He always passed out before they left him alone.  
  
Sixty-one sleeps into his undetermined sentence, his heart stopped.  
  
He ran to the bars and griped them tightly, his eyes not leaving the new prisoner’s face.  
  
 _Draco._  
  
He forced the dread and despair deep down inside as the dementor pushed Draco into the cell right next to his and slammed the gate shut. His throat was dry and hurt like hell, but he opened his mouth to speak anyway.  
  
Nothing came out.  
  
What felt like hours later, Theo moved from the bars of his cell to the wall he now shared with Draco. His frozen hands lay flat on the cold stone, as if they were trying to feel Draco through them. As if they were trying to feel anything.  
  
“Draco?” He croaked, barely above a whisper. He wasn’t even certain he’d said it aloud.  
  
“Theo.”  
  
Theo turned to follow Draco’s voice. He must’ve been standing right next to the bars. Without thinking he threw his hand around the wall and his skin encountered another human being in over two months.  
  
Tears he didn’t know he had rolled down his cheeks as he gripped his best friend for dear life.  
  
“Fuck, what are you doing here?”  
  
“My trial was today.”  
  
Draco’s voice was emotionless.  
  
Flat.  
  
Dead.  
  
“What?” Theo couldn’t figure out why this bothered him. Maybe the fact that he didn’t receive a trial? Or that Draco had been convicted? Or that he was a shitty friend and so fucking thankful that Draco was here with him.  
  
“He spoke for me. It didn’t matter though, in the end. It didn’t even matter.”  
  
Theo squeezed Draco’s hand. “But he tried.”  
  
The sniff he heard broke his heart.  
  
“He really did.”  
  
Theo swallowed harshly, wondering silently if anyone was out there trying for him.  
  
~~~~  
  
“I’ve got a meeting with the Minister at three.”  
  
Neville looked up to see Harry standing in front of his desk. “Do you really?” He pulled out a memo and handed it to Harry, watching his face.  
  
“Do you think it’s for evaluations or something?” Harry asked as he handed the memo back.  
  
Neville shrugged. “No idea. Eval’s wouldn’t make sense though, we just had one a few months back.”  
  
Harry swallowed, his emerald eyes burning into Neville. “Do you think...?”  
  
Neville took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Harry had been working on the new Azkaban reform bill ever since he became an Auror over a year ago. It was the one thing that he cared most about. Others in the department always questioned it. _Doesn’t Harry see what these criminals have done? Why would Harry Potter fight so hard for them? Why would he care?_  
  
Neville knew why. He knew exactly why Harry cared so much.  
  
“Don’t get your hopes up.” Neville warned. They’ve played this game before, and they’ve lost every time.  
  
“Right. Could be about anything.”  
  
Neville nodded then watched Harry walk away. He glanced at the memo, wondering if this were the time that maybe they would win.  
  


* * *

  
Neville sat completely still while Kingsley beamed at Harry, explaining the updated terms of the new Azkaban probation rollout. So far, he’d liked what he heard, and if Harry’s bouncing leg was any indication, he liked it, too.  
  
“We can start the process next week-“  
  
Harry held up his hand, effectively cutting off the Minister. “Next week? Why not right now?”  
  
Kingsley raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Right now? As in today?”  
  
“As in I’m ready to apparate there right now and get them out.”  
  
Neville noticed Kingsley shift in his seat, clearly he had other ideas.  
  
“The probationary program isn’t being extended to everyone, Harry.”  
  
Harry sat very still. “Who is being left out and why.”  
  
Kingsley’s dramatic pause wasn’t helping Neville’s sprits.  
  
“Theodore Nott.”  
  
“Why?” Neville asked, speaking for the first time.  
  
“He didn’t meet the criteria.”  
  
“Bullshit.” Harry seethed as he stood up to pace the room. “He meets the criteria fine. I know this because I helped write the damn bill!”  
  
“He’ll need a trial first-“  
  
“Don’t give me that excuse, Kings.” Harry spat. “They threw him into Azkaban without one, he certainly doesn’t need one to get out.”  
  
“It’s because of the confession, isn’t it?” Neville said flatly.  
  
Kingsley’s eyes turned sad. “Yes.”  
  
“He was seventeen.” Neville said simply. “I killed a man at seventeen, too.”  
  
“You know that’s different.”  
  
“Is it?” Neville sad hotly. “I destroyed a horcrux, effectively killing Voldemort. I got a job because of it, while Theo got thrown in prison.”  
  
“You also don’t have a Dark Mark on your arm.” Kingsley said pointedly. “The fact that he admitted to murder is enough for the Wizengamot to deny his application.”  
  
“How do we petition?” Neville asked quickly.  
  
“It won’t be simple.”  
  
“I don’t care. I don’t care one bit.”

* * *

  
  
Neville took a long drink of his beer as he sat at Ron and Hermione’s kitchen table that evening. The words on the page were beginning to blur, and nothing was making sense anymore.  
  
“What time is it?” He groaned.  
  
“Well after midnight.” Hermione answered. “You should get some sleep.”  
  
Neville smirked at his friend. She was engrossed in the reform bill, triple checking for any loopholes they could use.  
  
“There’s got to be something.” Harry grumbled. “We knew this would happen. We knew they would try this.”  
  
“It’s all in the wording.” Hermione answered. “We just have to find the exact text that they don’t agree with and twist it.”  
  
“I’m shocked that you don’t have it memorized.” Neville said to her. “Since you wrote it and all.”  
  
“You both helped.” Hermione answered, again without looking up.  
  
Harry seemed incredibly proud of himself. So much so that Neville laughed. He didn’t think that would be possible under the circumstances.  
  
“Head upstairs.” Ron ordered. “Both of you. You’ll be no good tomorrow if you’re dead on your feet.”  
  
Harry looked to Neville nervously. “Stop.” He ordered.  
  
Harry looked guilty now. “You know I can’t help it.”  
  
“Well stop it anyway.” Neville assured. He stood and began helping Ron clean up their mess so they could turn in.  
  
“I can’t believe it.” Harry breathed. “Tomorrow. He’ll be out tomorrow.”  
  
“He might not be the same, Harry.” Hermione said gently.  
  
“Let’s hope not.” Ron grumbled. At Hermione’s stern glare he rushed to correct himself. “You know what I mean!”  
  
Neville chuckled again. Maybe he was losing his mind. Carrying their empty bottles and plates to the sink he craned his neck from side to side. He was only tired. That was it. He was tired.  
  
Tired of it all.  
  
Ron placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, making him snap back to reality.  
  
“We’ll get him out, too.”  
  
Neville nodded. “Thanks, Ron. For everything.”  
  
With a crooked smile Ron went back to the table, ushering everyone to bed.  
  


* * *

  
_Neville sat in the library studying like he did every Thursday night. It had nothing to do with Theodore Nott, who also stayed late on Thursday’s to study. Nothing at all. The books Moody had given him were quite fascinating, and he was fairly sure he’d found something that could help Harry with the second task of the tournament.  
  
“Are you going to tell him? Or just wait until it’s too late.”  
  
Neville’s head snapped up to see Theo leaning over the desk, smirking at him. That smirk was going to kill him. “I just want to make sure that it’s right and it’ll work.”  
  
“Do you doubt me?”  
  
“No!” He burst out. He felt his cheeks burn as he was shushed by the half dozen students around them. “No.” He whispered. “Of course I don’t.”  
  
“You should be more confident in yourself, Neville.”  
  
Neville didn’t know if his face could get any redder.  
  
“There’s some new reads in the potions section that have to do with some plants and other ingredients.” Theo reached over and ripped off a spare sheet of parchment and scribbled something on it, then handed it back to Neville. “You should check them out.”  
  
“I will.”  
  
He watched Theo walk away, completely head over heels in love with him. _  
  
Neville gasped as he woke up. It had been a while since he’d let himself dream of Theo. Running his hands down his face he reached over to grab his wallet from the bedside table, thumbing through it until he found Theo’s note.  
  
 _Save a dance for me, after the ball. I want to see if those lessons of yours have really paid off. Yours, Theo._  
  
He fell asleep still holding it.  
  
~~~~  
  
It took the tall guard with blonde hair exactly one hundred steps to get from the stairs to Theo’s cell. The brown haired one with stubby legs made it in one hundred fifty-six. It’s been two hundred fifty-seven sleeps since the dementors were removed and four hundred ninety-five sleeps total. He’d slept next to the wall every single night, most times holding Draco’s hand through the cell bars.  
  
He never once asked how long Draco’s sentence was. He didn’t want to know. He felt relieved every single morning that Draco was there with him, which killed him inside to think. He should be ashamed of his thoughts, but he couldn’t bring himself to be. Draco made everything better. Even on the days they never spoke a word, Draco made it better.  
  
 _Bang... bang.... bang..._  
  
Theo stood and scrambled to the opposite wall, facing the bars of his cell. He held himself perfectly still, barely even breathing.  
  
Three smacks on the wall meant cell inspection. He hated those. He didn’t have anything to hide, but the guards were intrusive and liked to take their frustrations out on the prisoners. There was no one to tell, so Theo let him toss his things around. Overturn is food that was just delivered, forcing him to eat it off the floor. Hit him.  
  
They hit him often.  
  
Most guards didn’t want to be there and saw their rotation as a grave inconvenience. Might as well take out those frustrations on a few prisoners while they were there. Might help pass the time, he supposed.  
  
It was late in the day for an inspection. Dinner and shift change had long passed. Theo furrowed his brow unintentionally, wondering what this was about. If the guards became too bored, they liked to create reasons to torment prisoners. It had been a while since he or Draco had been a target of their boredom. Last time Draco had been accused of trying to use his magic, despite his resistance cuff not showing any attempts.  
  
He spent two weeks in solitary.  
  
Those two weeks were worse than Theo’s first nights in Azkaban.  
  
He dared to take a quick breath before he schooled his features and sent his mind somewhere else. It would be over quickly, he told himself.  
  
His cell opened. He didn’t move. Didn’t blink. He stood still as a statue while his bed was tossed, and his shabby blanket was ripped of the thin mattress. He didn’t flinch as a guard purposely ran into him as he felt along the walls for hidden depressions. He didn’t make a sound as that same guard’s fist slammed into his stomach. His eyes watered, but he kept his composure. He wouldn’t give them this.  
  
With a grunt the two guards left his cell and locked him in again, then moved onto Draco’s. Theo’s body convulsed, tying to suck in air but not be obvious about it.  
  
“Time’s up.” One of them barked.  
  
“What?” Draco whispered.  
  
Without another word they grabbed him by the arms and hauled him out of the cell, dragging him down the hallway.  
  
Theo panicked. What did that mean? Where were they taking him? “Draco!” He screamed, running to the bars and reaching through them to touch him one last time. “Draco! No!”  
  
“Get back!” A guard shoved his hand in Theo’s face, trying to push him back but Theo wasn’t having any of that.  
  
“Draco! No! No! Please!”  
  
He couldn’t do this without him. He reached through the bars and pushed all the magic he could into his hands. One more touch. Just one more.

One more to last a lifetime.  
  
He felt his skin begin to burn, the shock of the cuff trying to resist the magic he was attempting to use. He screamed in pain but didn’t give up. He needed this. “P-please!”  
  
Without warning he was forced backward by a stunning spell. His head crashed against the stonewall, making him dizzy and his vision blurry. He felt himself being dragged down the cold stone hallway, his left arm still burning and his head bleeding.  
  
“D-Draco...”

* * *

  
  
_Theo wiped the dried blood from Neville’s cheek, trying and failing to push down his anger over this entire situation. His boyfriend that no one knew he had was getting cursed and beaten daily. His best friend was forbidden to leave his home, in who knows what state of life. For all he knew Draco could be dead, and he wouldn’t even now it. He could be-  
  
“Hey.”  
  
Neville reached up and palmed his cheek gently, bringing him back to the present. He didn’t want to waste these precious minutes he had with him. “I’m sorry, I get lost sometimes.”  
  
Neville chuckled softly. “I know.”  
  
“I hate this, Nev. I’ve never hated anything more.”  
  
“We’ll get through this. I promise.”  
  
“How can you be so sure? How can you know that everything will work out?”  
  
Neville shrugged. “I have to believe that it will be, or what else are we fighting for?”  
  
Theo sighed and pressed his forehead against Neville’s. “I wish I could do the same. And I wish you didn’t put yourself in the line of fire so damn much.”  
  
“Theo.” Neville breathed. “I’m fighting to make things right. I’m fighting so we can be free. I’m fighting for us. I’ll never give up as long as there’s an us, do you understand?”  
  
Theo just nodded, the words stuck in his throat. He loved this boy so much, and he wished he could just say the words.  
  
“For us.” Neville repeated._  
  
Theo woke up and groaned at the pain he felt all over. His arm was most likely broken, his head was so tender that he was sure there would still be an open wound if he bothered to check. His ankles were shackled with cold metal and the room was pitch black. He’d never been in a room so dark. And cold. It was so cold.  
  
He felt around for a blanket or anything that might have been provided, but he came up with nothing. His hand went into a bowl of cold... something, and he wondered if that was meant to be his meal. He didn’t feel hungry, despite not knowing how long he’d been in here.  
  
He’d lost all track of time.  
  
Time was the only thing he had left, and now he’s lost it.  
  
“Neville?” He croaked into the darkness. His throat convulsed with emotions that he’d refused to let himself feel for so long. How easy it would be to just give up... to let himself fall into the darkness and never wake again.  
  
“For us.” Theo had to believe that there was still an _us._ He had to believe that somewhere out there, Neville was still fighting.  
  
Fighting for him.  
  
Fighting for _us._  
  
~~~~  
  
Neville spent the next two weeks thinking of nothing, but Theo. Harry had taken leave to get Draco settled into his probation, and even though he was genuinely happy for him, he was well beyond jealous. He was angry.  
  
Angry at everything.  
  
Hermione read though every word, triple checking all their clauses to be absolutely sure they didn’t miss anything. Neville was honestly surprised that this was where they were. Theo’s lack of trial had always been on their minds, and Harry made sure to include that in the bill given that it’s now happened to two people in his life.  
  
With a sigh he pulled out the copies he had of Theo and Draco’s case files, thinking another read through couldn’t hurt.  
  
“Neville!” Hermione burst into his office, making him jump.  
  
“What-“  
  
“It’s done! We did it!”  
  
Neville stood from his chair as she threw herself at him. “We did?”  
  
“Yes! Neville, it’s done. It’s over!”  
  
“How?”  
  
Hermione pulled back and handed him the file that she clutched in her hand. “I appealed. The court date was today.”  
  
Neville gaped at her. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would have been there.”  
  
“I know. That’s why I didn’t tell you.” Hermione summoned a chair and sat down, making Neville do the same. “I spoke to Draco.”  
  
“You did?” He asked, surprised. “How- how is he?”  
  
“Not well. Awful, actually. He’s worse than I thought he would be.” She admitted. “It took nearly an hour for us to have a simple conversation. He was very overwhelmed.”  
  
Neville closed his eyes and breathed deep. “Damn.”  
  
“Harry escorted him to the hearing this morning. He gave his statement privately in the Minister’s office, then flooed back to Harry’s right after.”  
  
“Statement? Statement for what?”  
  
“The new amendment I’ve added to the reform bill. About... about prisoner brutality.”  
  
Neville could feel the anger boiling inside his chest. “Prisoner brutality?”  
  
Hermione nodded slowly. “From what he’s told me, it’s bad. I didn’t know what it would be like there, I thought that getting the dementors out would make it better-“  
  
“Hermione.” He said gently. “None of us have any idea what it’s like in there. Getting rid of the dementors was a good thing. I know it.”  
  
“I wish we could have done more sooner.”  
  
“When will he be released?”  
  
“Tomorrow. The only thing that’s left is the restitution.”  
  
Neville just nodded. He’d expected that. “How much?”  
  
Hermione looked away nervously. “They took Nott Manor.”  
  
Neville raised his eyebrows. That’s a hefty price. “Wow. Alright then. I won’t be telling him that right away.”  
  
“I’m sorry, I tried-“  
  
“Hermione, I know you tried. I don’t care if they take every last knut of his and mine, it’s worth it. Thank you. I don’t know how to thank you for everything you’ve done.”  
  
“When he’s better you can have me over. I miss talking to someone who read as much of the Hogwarts library as I have.”  
  
Neville smiled at her. “Done.” He sat back in his chair and let the weight of the world slip away. “Tomorrow. My god, Hermione. Tomorrow.”  
  
She beamed at him with tears in her eyes. “Tomorrow.”  
  


* * *

  
Neville apparated to Azkaban prison, escorted by Ron. The check-in seemed normal enough and the place looked decent, but he kept Hermione’s words in mind as he was led further into the prison. He glanced at Ron, who seemed to have the same disgusted look on his face the longer they walked. Neville tried to remember that in a matter of minutes Theo would be in his arms and he could take him home, it was the only thing keeping him from doing something stupid.  
  
“How much further?” Ron asked.  
  
The guard leading them didn’t even bother to look at him. “A while. Solitary is in the lower levels.”  
  
“Solitary?” Neville questioned. “Why is he there?”  
  
“He attacked a guard. That’s protocol.”  
  
Neville didn’t say anything more.  
  
Several minutes later they’d reached his cell. The solid metal door was cold to the touch and even with Neville being fully clothed he was freezing. When the guard opened the door, he was not prepared for what he saw.  
  
“Theo? What the fuck?” Neville rushed into the dark cell, the only light being the dim lamps in the hallway.  
  
Theo was lying unconscious on the stone floor, whether his body was covered in grime or blood or something else, Neville wasn’t sure. His face looked swollen and bruised. His left arm had black veiny scorch marks from wrist to elbow.  
  
He was so thin. So pale.  
  
Neville’s breathing became labored as he tried to push down everything he felt. Seeing _his_ Theo in this state, after everything he’s done to try and make the world they live in now something better than what it was, this disgusted him. “Can I apparate from here?” He growled.  
  
“Wards.” The guard grunted.  
  
“Anti-apparition.” Ron nodded, turning to Neville. “We’ve got to get him back to the first level, then.”  
  
“I’ll carry him.” Neville announced, leaving no room for argument. He turned back to the guard and glared. “Did you know he was like this? He could be dead tomorrow!” He screamed.  
  
The guard looked unfazed. “He’s a Death Eater.”  
  
Neville stood up, ready to slam the man right into the wall when Ron shoved his way between them. “Don’t lose it.” Ron said as he gripped Neville’s arm. “Not now. Get him out of here.”  
  
Neville stared the guard down, satisfied that he had the good sense to look uncomfortable. Turning back he looked at Theo and closed his eyes, trying to regain his composure. His self-control was something he grew to pride himself on. He had to have a clear mind as an Auror, and his collectedness had gotten him out of several terrible situations. His perseverance to just keep moving on always told them that it does get better.  
  
He would give Theo better.  
  
He would give Theo everything.  
  
Shrugging off his jacket he wrapped it around Theo the best he could, then gently lifted him up. He tried not to be shocked at how light he felt, the man in his arms felt like a sliver of the man that Neville remembered. Every inch of Theo’s skin felt ice cold. His fingers looked purple and his skin translucent.  
  
“Right. Let’s go then.” Ron said to the silent room.

* * *

  
  
Neville had set everything up the night before, unable to sleep. He was overanxious at finally being able to see Theo again. To hold him. To love him. He wasn’t prepared for what he saw today, even with Hermione and Harry’s warnings, he did not at all comprehend the state Theo would be in.  
  
Ron called for Hannah when they arrived at his townhouse, hoping she could do something to help. Neville set him up in a small guest room at the end of hall from his own bedroom. It wasn’t much, but it had a soft bed and clean sheets. Harry said that Draco didn’t do well with lots of space and tried to make himself as small as possible when they were in one of the larger rooms at Grimmauld.  
  
Neville hovered over Theo until Hannah kicked him out, telling him she had a job to do and he was just getting in the way. Ron met him in the kitchen with a mug of tea and sat in comfortable silence with him until Hannah finally came downstairs.  
  
“Well?” Neville barked as he stood.  
  
“Don’t get that tone with me, Neville.” She chastised as she moved passed him to get her own mug of tea.  
  
“I’m sorry. I’m just-“  
  
She turned around and smiled in understanding. “I know.”  
  
Neville pulled out her chair for her as she sat at the small table, waiting for her to give an update.  
  
“He’s in rough shape. Worse than Draco.” She finally said.  
  
“Malfoy was mental that first night.” Ron said to her. “Hate for it to sound this way, but maybe it’s better that he’s unconscious. Harry said that Malfoy’s magic was uncontrollable.”  
  
“I could see that.” Hannah said with a nod. “The black burn marks on his arm are from the cuff. It suppresses their magical ability. The first time it came off Draco most likely didn’t know how to handle it.”  
  
“Harry gave him his wand.” Ron added. “Maybe you shouldn’t do that for a bit, yea?”  
  
“Right.” Neville answered lamely. He was way over his head. “Is he... is he healthy?”  
  
“Not at all.” Hannah said before she sipped her tea. “I’ve left instructions on his beside with a few potions for you. His arm will need a salve twice a day. His wrist where the cuff was is raw, use it there, too. He’s dehydrated and malnourished, so start with small simple foods. Don’t throw anything too heavy at him, he won’t be able to keep it down. I healed some cracked ribs and minor fractures, so he might be sore for a few days when he wakes up.”  
  
Neville jumped at that. “And when will that be?”  
  
“I’m not sure how long he was out for to begin with, Nev. Maybe a day or two? Keep the room warm, but not overly so. His body needs to adjust.”  
  
Neville nodded, wishing he were writing all of this down.  
  
“Hey.” Hannah reached over and placed her hand over his. “It’s all upstairs in the instructions.”  
  
Neville relaxed at her words. “Thank you, Hannah. I know that this is all about him, but I’m incredibly overwhelmed right now.”  
  
“It’s not just about him, it’s about you, too.” She reassured. “Harry must’ve flooed me a dozen times in the first hour after I left. It’s okay to be nervous.”  
  
“You’ll figure it out, mate. Don’t worry.” Ron said easily. Sometimes Neville really wished he had that Weasley confidence.  
  
“Thank you both. for everything.”  
  
They talked for another half hour or so, until it was clear that Neville couldn’t sit still any longer. When his friends left, he raced up the stairs to Theo’s room, taking a few steadying breaths before he quietly opened the door. The lights in the room were dim but was still well lit compared to Azkaban. Neville adjusted the blankets resting on Theo’s chest and pulled them up a little more. He cast a warming charm on the sheets, so no matter where Theo rolled to on the bed it would be warm, if he moved at all.  
  
He went to the small closet and looked at the clothes he had put there, wondering if they’d even fit Theo now. They could always be adjusted, there was no point in worrying about that now. He wanted to hold him but didn’t want to scare him or hurt him. He wanted to curl himself around Theo’s body and never let the man out of his sight ever again.  
  
Settling for sitting beside the bed in a single accent chair Neville watched Theo sleep until is his own eyes became heavy. He wondered if he kept the lights on if Theo would be startled to see Neville in bed with him if he woke up during the night.  
  
Deciding he was being selfish, he swished his wand and placed a charm on the bed to let him know if Theo got up, kissed his still chilled forehead then forced himself to leave the room and go to bed.  
  
The night was uneventful. Theo didn't even move. Neville checked on him first thing in the morning, saddened that there wasn't any change. He showered and made himself breakfast, then headed up to Theo's room to continue the care Hannah had begun. He tried his best not to choke him as he held the potions to his lips and slowly poured them down his throat. He applied the salve to his arm and wrist, very pissed off at the look of the raw chafed skin.  
  
His temperature seemed to have returned to normal, which Neville was thankful for. His color was still pale and sickly, but he tried his best to remind himself that this would be a long process and to take one win at a time. Theo was a free man and finally with him. He was alive. He would wake up any time now.  
  
Theo had to wake up. Neville wouldn't allow anything else.  
  
The next three days had crawled by just as they had done before. Neville found himself hovering and pacing, feeling helpless. By the time dinner rolled around Neville was anxious for something to do, just so he didn't feel like he wasn't doing enough to help Theo. Grabbing a book he figured he'd sit in Theo's room since puttering around the house wasn't doing him any good.  
  
He checked Theo's bandages and was pleased with the progress the salve had done for him. The nutritional potions Hannah had left seemed to be doing a remarkable job as well. He thought about attempting to change his clothes but didn't want to disturb him too much. He prepared his potions and turned back just in time to see Theo's eyes flutter and his breath hitch.  
  
"Theo?"  
  
~~~~  
  
He dreamt of Neville again. His soft, caring touch. His kind and patient eyes. His gentle fingers carefully gliding across his skin. He felt warm. He could feel it in his bones, Neville's warmth flooding his body, engulfing him in a flood of heat. He could smell him. Pine and dirt and fresh air. His eyes stung at the scent. He thought he forgotten it. He didn't want to forget a single thing about him. He didn't want to wake up, but knew he had to in order to keep going. He had to keep fighting. Stay awake. He needed to stay awake.  
  
Light hit his eyes, and he was suddenly confused. Was he moved? How much time had he lost now?  
  
"Theo?"  
  
His eyes snapped open painfully. Neville. That was Neville's voice. Tears leaked out of his eyes. What was happening?  
  
"Love?"  
  
He turned slowly to see Neville's concerned face hovering close. "N-n-"  
  
"Shh." Neville whispered. "Shh. I'm here."  
  
A large warm hand covered his and gave it a soft squeeze. Was this real? He felt so real. Neville's calloused fingertips felt like heaven on his skin. He couldn't remember a dream that was more vivid.  
  
"You're out. We did it, you never have to go back. I'm so sorry, Theo. I'm so so sorry."  
  
"I'm... I'm out?" He couldn't make any more words. His brain felt sluggish and heavy.  
  
"Yes. You're home with me. It's all over."  
  
Theo tried swallow, but his mouth and throat were so dry.  
  
"Here." Neville turned and reached for a glass and filled it with water.  
  
 _Aguamenti. The water making spell. An exception to Gamp's transfiguration laws. You can't make something out of nothing, except for water, thats why-_  
  
"Do you want me to help you?"  
  
Neville's question brought him out of his own mind. "Please."  
  
Neville placed his hand behind Theo's head and lifted it slowly, allowing him to take a few small sips of water. The human contact made his entire body shiver.  
  
"Are you still cold?" Neville asked quickly.  
  
He knew his shiver wasn't from his body temperature. "I'll be fine." Neville made to pull away and Theo panicked. "Don't go."  
  
Neville rested his hand against Theo's once again after the set the glass down. "Believe me, Theo. I'm not going anywhere."  
  
"How long have I been asleep?"  
  
"I'm not sure, really. I brought you home four days ago. You were unconscious and in solitary when I got you."  
  
"You... you were there?"  
  
Neville nodded. "I wasn't letting anyone else see you before me. Theo, I'm so sorry."  
  
"I'm sorry you had to see that." Theo said honestly. "What day is it?"  
  
"The twenty-second."  
  
That didn't mean anything to Theo. "How many days since Draco was released?"  
  
"Eighteen."  
  
"Is he...?"  
  
"He's good." Neville assured. "He's with Harry. He's... they're healing."  
  
Theo closed his eyes, feeling something he could only describe as relief. When was the last time he felt that? Seventh year? For a fleeting moment? Sixth? Before he had any idea what was happening around him? Fifth? When-  
  
"Hey." Neville played his cheek gently. "Still getting lost I see."  
  
"It's the only thing I had to keep me going. Memories." Theo admitted. He was staring and he knew it, but he didn't know how to stop. He didn't want to stop.  
  
“How are you feeling?”  
  
“I don’t know.” He took a moment to think about it. “Sore. Weak. Dirty.”  
  
“Would you like a shower?”  
  
Theo tried to sit up but couldn’t find the energy. “I’m not sure I could stand.”  
  
Neville smiled. “A bath then.”  
  
Neville pulled the blanket back and Theo shivered violently. “Shit, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”  
  
“I’m alright. Just cold.”  
  
Neville helped him sit up then shrugged off the sweater he was wearing and draped it around Theo’s narrow shoulders then carefully slid his arms through the sleeves. “Ready?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
Theo couldn’t put the euphoria he felt at Neville’s arms being wrapped around his body. He stood motionless, lost in the feeling of protection and comfort the gesture provided. That _Neville_ provided.  
  
“Are you alright?” Neville asked nervously.  
  
Theo laid his cheek on Neville’s shoulder and his arms around his neck, pressing himself even closer. “I’m wonderful.”  
  
Neville seemed to understand and hugged him back. “Fuck. I missed you, Theo. Every fucking minute.”  
  
“Every minute.” Theo repeated.  
  
The walk to the bathroom was unstable and embarrassing. Theo had no comprehension of how weak he really was. He felt terrible that Neville practically carried him down the hall. He sat down on the edge of the massive tub and fumbled with the buttons of his night shirt while Neville filled it.  
  
“Would you like me to help you?”  
  
Theo nodded in frustration. He knew how to unbutton a shirt for Salazar’s sake. Neville knelt in front of him and stilled his fingers, then slipped each button through the holes with ease.  
  
“Hannah said that it might be a while before you’ll feel like yourself again. Baby steps. You made it all the way down the hall to the bathroom.”  
  
“You carried me to the bathroom.” Theo corrected.  
  
Neville stopped and looked up at him. “You got out of bed an made it all the way to the bathroom. Baby steps.”  
  
The tub filled quickly, and Theo suddenly felt very shy about his body. He knew Neville must’ve cast a few cleaning charms on him once he was released, but he still felt the grime of Azkaban sticking to his skin.  
  
“Would you like me to give you some privacy? You can call for me when you’re done.”  
  
“No!” Theo rushed. “No, I’m just... I’m being stupid.”  
  
“Theo. You’re far from stupid.”  
  
“Please stay with me.”  
  
Neville gave him a genuine smile. “Aright.” He turned and fussed with getting out fresh fluffy towels while Theo undressed.  
  
“Neville?”  
  
Neville turned his head to the side to show he heard him but didn’t turn around out of respect. “Hmm?”  
  
“Will you...” Theo swallowed harshly. “Will you, um... share the bath with me?”  
  
“Of course. If that’s what you want.”  
  
Theo nodded even though Neville wasn’t looking at him. With shaky legs he stood and slipped into the wonderfully warm bubble bath, sighing with content as he did. “Aright.”  
  
Neville turned and saw Theo got in by himself alright, then undressed before him, never once taking his eyes off of him. He thought he would feel inadequate watching Neville reveal the parts of his body Theo hadn’t seen or touched in nearly two years, but none of that came. Instead he watched unashamed, fascinated by the man in front him. Neville slid in behind him slowly, letting Theo get comfortable against him.  
  
Neville’s arms came around him and settled against his chest. Theo couldn’t help but smile and relax against him, his own hands resting against Neville’s, ensuring that he couldn’t go anywhere. Theo felt so small compared to Neville’s lean frame, but he also felt protected. Surrounded by Neville Longbottom was the only thing in the world he wanted to feel.  
  
He watched with tired eyes as the color returned to his skin, making it flush and glow. He sighed as Neville reached for his own shower gel, filling the air with that perfect Neville scent. His head was resting on Neville’s shoulder, his hands wrapped around Neville’s knees. Closing his eyes he savored the feeling of Neville lathering his skin and washing his body. So gently. So carefully. He washed his knotted hair and massaged his scalp until his fingers ran through it with ease. He soaped up Theo’s chest and rubbed the cloth over every inch of his skin that he could reach.  
  
He cleaned under Theo’s nails and rinsed the shampoo out of his hair. He turned him carefully so he could wash his face. If he noticed the tears falling from Theo’s eyes, he didn’t say anything, just washed them away with the rest of the bad and the sad.  
  
When Neville got to his arm however, he jerked it out of reach. Neville had never seen it before. He’d always made sure to keep his Dark Mark hidden from view, despite them both knowing it was there. Granted, they’d not been together but a handful of times after Theo had received it, but it mattered to him that Neville never saw it.  
  
“Theo.”  
  
“Please.” He begged.  
  
“There’s nothing but a scar there now.”  
  
“I can still see it.” Theo whispered.  
  
Neville slowly took Theo’s arm back, making him bury his face into Neville’s shoulder. He didn’t want to see Neville’s face.  
  
“We’ve talked about this.” Neville responded simply. “A long time ago.”  
  
“I know. But that was before I was thrown in prison for being a Death Eater.”  
  
“Baby. Look at me.”  
  
He didn’t want to. He didn’t want to see it. Whether it was judgement or disgust or even acceptance, Theo didn’t want to see any of it. “How can you still love me?”  
  
“I love you because you’re still Theodore Nott. And I’ve loved you since fourth year.”  
  
“I’m a murderer.”  
  
“Have you forgotten that I was there? One day you’ll have to explain to me why you wouldn’t let me tell anyone that.”  
  
“I didn’t want anything to happen to you. You deserve a good life. I didn’t want my stupidity to hold you back. To everyone else I’m a murderer.”  
  
“I don’t care about everyone else. I deserve you. And we deserve a good life. Together.”  
  
Neville spun him back around so Theo could rest against his chest once again. He felt his eyes becoming heavy after a while and instinctively curled into Neville to trap his warmth.  
  
“Are you cold? You have goosebumps.”  
  
“You’re warm. Don’t want to leave.”  
  
Neville chuckled at him. “You can’t fall asleep in the bath. You haven’t eaten yet.”  
  
“Not hungry.”  
  
Neville held him for a bit longer, then insisted they get out because he knew Theo was falling asleep. He helped him dry off and change into clean pajamas, and when Theo could barely stand Neville carried him to bed.  
  
“Theo? Wake up love, just for a minute.”  
  
Theo couldn’t remember the last time he was genuinely this tired. He didn’t want to sleep to escape or dream, he just wanted to sleep. He felt Neville tilt his head and hold a cold glass vial to his lips.  
  
“Please drink this, then you can sleep. I promise. It’s to help you regain your strength.”  
  
Theo drank it slowly, trying not to gag at the taste that filled his mouth. He wasn’t sure he knew what flavor was anymore and couldn’t process the taste.  
  
“There you go. Brilliant. You can rest now.”  
  
Theo’s head hit the pillow and he was out.

* * *

  
  
_Theo felt a heavy weight upon him, constricting his movement. He felt trapped under the weight.  
  
“I will find him.”  
  
Theo opened his blue eyes to see the exact same eyes staring back at him.  
  
Only these eyes were cruel. Cold. Hateful.  
  
How could he let his father find him? How could he be so stupid? He wasn’t paying attention, and that was careless. He was searching for Neville. The chaos of the battle had set him in a panicked frenzy to make sure that he was alright. Just a glimpse, thats all he wanted. Just a simple glance his way to let him know that Neville was alive.  
  
So far, he hadn’t found him.  
  
“I will find him first. You’re so annoyingly transparent, Theodore.”  
  
Theo struggled against his weight, but it was useless. His father was a strong man, still a trusted warrior to the Dark Lord. His arm burned with the call of his master, and Theo grit his teeth against the pain. It only hurt because he resisted, that’s what his father had told him.  
  
“Accept it!” His father seethed. “He is your master. You will obey him!”  
  
“I will never!” He cried. “Never.”  
  
“He calls. You must go, Theodore.”  
  
Theo slammed his eyes shut and tried to think of anything else but the pain in his arm.  
  
His father screamed in frustration and slapped him. “You stupid boy! I will find him! I will kill him!”  
  
_Theo woke up in a tangled mess of sheets. He couldn’t breathe. Why couldn’t he get free? He felt sticky sweat all over his body despite being chilled to the bone. Falling out of the bed he hit the floor and ran to the bars of his cell, looking for Draco. He ran into a solid wall face first and stumbled backwards confused.  
  
“Draco?” He felt around on the wall and realized it wasn’t right. This was wasn’t right. Where was he? Turning quickly he tripped over something heavy with sharp edges trying to find another wall. Something crashed to the floor and shattered, but he didn’t have the energy to process what that could possibly be.  
  
“Draco!” Theo beat his fist against another wall wondering where the hell he was until he remembered that he was in solitary, and Draco was gone. “Draco!” He heard something on the other side of the wall as he slid down it, sobbing.  
  
“Theo? Shit, what happened? What’s wrong?”  
  
He was too hysterical to speak. Warm hands rested on his shoulders, pulling him close. He tried to fight back but couldn’t see what he was doing or who it was.  
  
“Theo! It’s me, it’s alright. I’m here.”  
  
He knew that voice. Neville? How was Neville here?  
  
“Shh. I’ve got you. You’re not there anymore. You’re safe, remember?”  
  
“D-Draco?”  
  
“He’s safe, too. I promise.” Neville cupped his cheek; gently guiding Theo’s face up to his. “It’s alright.”  
  
“Nev-Neville.” He choked. Oh god, Neville was here. “Neville.”  
  
“What happened?”  
  
“I- I had a dream. I couldn’t move. I woke up and couldn’t find Draco and I got scared and-“  
  
“Easy, easy.”  
  
Theo tried to take a deep breath, but it got stuck in his chest. “I can’t breathe.”  
  
“Relax, Theo. Watch me, okay? Eyes on me.”  
  
He tried to focus only on him. Neville took a slow deep breath, so Theo tried to copy him. His grip on Neville’s shoulders eventually loosened and after a while he was able to breathe without feeling like he was going to pass out.  
  
“Better now?”  
  
Theo leaned back so his head fell against the wall. “I’m sorry.”  
  
“You have nothing to be sorry for. I should have left a light on for you, I wasn’t thinking.”  
  
Theo gave him a small smile and reached a shaky hand out for Neville’s. Through his closed eyes he registered a soft light glowing from somewhere in the room. He was grateful that Neville waited to turn on the lights until he was calm; he wasn’t sure if he could handle the disorientation before.  
  
“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up and back to bed. You’re shivering. Shit, you’re also bleeding.”  
  
“What?” Theo opened his eyes to see blood smeared all over his night shirt.  
  
“You cut your hand. Must’ve been from the vase. Can you stand?”  
  
Theo pushed himself up off the floor on wobbly legs, holding onto Neville for support. He felt very foolish for not being able to stand now when he was just in hysterics running around the room pounding on the walls. With Neville’s help he made it down the hall to the bathroom, where Neville dimmed the lights and sat him on the edge of the tub.  
  
Neville pulled out his wand and pointed it at him, and he flinched. The look of horror on Neville’s face was too much to bear.  
  
“Shit, I’m so sorry, Theo. I would never-“  
  
“I know.” He rushed. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”  
  
Neville quickly tossed his wand aside and grabbed a nearby cloth and began wiping Theo’s hand.  
  
“You can use magic. I’m not afraid of magic. Or you.”  
  
Neville didn’t respond, just continued working on Theo’s hand. He rose to get some bandages and wet a different cloth, then came back and cleaned his wound without a word.  
  
“Neville?”  
  
“I wasn’t thinking. I’ll be more cautious in the future.”  
  
Theo didn’t say anything more. Neville wrapped his hand then stood and gave Theo his own shirt to wear, instead of summoning one.  
  
“You didn’t sleep very long.” Neville said to him. “Do you want to try and go back to sleep?”  
  
“Can I stay with you?”  
  
Neville’s smile was worth the nightmare. “Of course you can.”  
  
Theo slipped into the clean t shirt then took Neville’s proffered hand and let him lead them to his bed. He told himself that tomorrow he would have to look around the house and see things properly, since he’d never been here before. Neville’s bed was large and warm and smelled just like him, and Theo instantly fell in love with it. His skin tingled when Neville pulled him close and tucked the blankets around his chest.  
  
“Do you want to talk about our dream?” Neville asked quietly. “Is that why you were looking for Draco?”  
  
“It was about _him._ My father. The night of the final battle. When I couldn’t find you, and he threatened to find you first and kill you.”  
  
Neville leaned in close and kissed the spot where Theo’s shoulder met his neck. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Theo’s eyes fluttered at the feeling. Fuck, how he had missed this man. “Well, we know how that turned out, don’t we.”  
  
“Don’t do that to yourself.” Neville chastised as he held him tighter. “He would have killed me and not thought twice about it, then killed you just because he could.”  
  
“I know.” He laced his fingers through Neville’s, knowing down to his very soul that if it meant killing his father to save Neville, he’d do it again faster than his heart beats. He knew he would willingly sit in Azkaban for the rest of his life if it meant that Neville could live. When it came down to it, there was nothing that Theo would not do for this man.

* * *

  
  
The next morning Theo woke up slowly and happy. He slept through the night with no other nightmares and found himself nearly laying across Neville’s body. He was just so warm, and Theo missed him. Neville didn’t seem to mind at all, as his legs were intertwined with Theo’s. He almost couldn’t tell where his body ended, and Neville’s began. He shamelessly rubbed his cheek on Neville’s chest hair, breathing him in.  
  
“Good morning.”  
  
Neville’s sleep filled morning voice was one of the most beautiful things he’d ever heard. “Good morning.”  
  
Neville’s fingertips traced a slow path up Theo’s thigh and backdown to his knee. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt sensations like this. His skin felt alive and his chest fluttered with anticipation, and all Neville did was brush his thigh. “Mmm. I missed you.”  
  
Neville kissed his forehead and his hand tightened on Theo’s thigh, his other hand pressing Theo closer to him. “I missed you, too. I missed how you felt against me. How you felt inside me.”  
  
Theo’s breath hitched. He never allowed himself to think about their most intimate moments. “Yea?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
Neville kissed his forehead again, then moved his hand from Theo’s thigh to rest his fingers under his chin. Slowly he raised Theo’s face, so they were only a breath apart. Neville’s lips felt like heaven. They were soft and delicate and caring. They moved against Theo’s own in slow brushes and steady rhythms. Theo climbed on top of him, putting his weight on his hands as they kissed. It wasn’t long before his arms began to shake from the strain. Neville broke their kiss and lightly pulled Theo down, so he was resting on his chest.  
  
“Don’t rush your healing. We have lots of time.”  
  
Theo was seconds away from being irritated with himself when Neville spoke. He was right though; they did have time. They had lots of time.  
  
He noticed that the cut on his hand was gone, meaning sometime in the night Neville had healed it with magic while Theo slept. Neville had made him lightly buttered toast and seemed happy enough that Theo ate it and didn’t feel sick afterwards. He sipped orange juice all morning, like a toddler that was only allowed one cup per day and was trying to make it last.

He was shown around the house at a terribly slow pace; Neville had patiently waited while he took breaks or leaned against him. Neville’s townhouse, he learned, used to be his parents’ home when they graduated Hogwarts. His gran had kept it all this time, for Neville. Theo could see how much that simple thought meant to him.

  
He wanted to ask so many questions but wasn’t sure if it was the right time.  
  
It was a decent size, and Theo dreaded the millions of stairs, but didn’t voice that aloud. He wanted to get stronger and feel normal again as soon as he could. Neville’s room was obviously the master and had so much of himself and his parents in that room that Theo never wanted to leave. There was a small balcony that faced the park across the street, and it became Theo’s favorite part of the room, except for the bed.  
  
He didn’t do much after the house tour, and he felt in the way often. Neville assured him that he wasn’t, and Theo knew that he wasn’t, but it didn’t help the feeling of being so out of place in Neville’s life.  
  
Neville hovered.  
  
Theo got awkward.  
  
Things felt tense.  
  
“Hey, babe?”  
  
Theo looked up from his spot in the living room chair he’d occupied for most of the day, lost in his mind. “Yes?”  
  
Neville was standing there, looking gorgeous with his worn jeans and his sleeves pushed up to his elbows. “Would you care for some tea? Lunch maybe?”  
  
Theo felt the corners of his mouth turn into a smile. “That sounds nice, yes.”  
  
Neville had said that he had a few work things to tie up, so Theo had left him alone while Neville disappeared into the small study he kept. With a start Theo realized that was hours ago. He felt cold and stiff from sitting in the same position for so long but forced himself to stand without Neville’s help.  
  
Neville kissed him sweetly once he was upright and they were face to face. “I didn’t mean to take so long. I’m sorry.”  
  
“It’s alright.” Theo assured him.  
  
“No, it’s not. I told them that I was out, and all my files were to be taken over by someone else in the department, but apparently that someone had a problem with my notes. Fucking Goldstien. Honestly.”  
  
Theo had no idea what he was talking about, he didn’t even know what Neville did for a living. “What was the issue?”  
  
“Cauldrons.” Neville breathed. “Can you believe that? Fucking cauldrons! I know I was shit at potions, but I know the damn difference between a pewter and a copper cauldron.”  
  
“What did your notes say that they couldn’t understand?”  
  
“He wanted to know that I was certain it was a copper cauldron, and not pewter, since polyjuice takes a ridiculously long time to brew.”  
  
“To be fair, that does make sense.” Theo said carefully.  
  
“I know, Ron found it strange, too. We decided that the brewers were idiots and just trying to sell really bad potions for cheap.”  
  
“Neville?”  
  
“Hmm?” He hummed as he prepared the kettle.  
  
“What is it that you do?”  
  
Neville stopped and looked at him. “I’m an Auror.”  
  
Theo’s brows rose. “Well, fuck.”  
  
Neville chuckled at him as he turned away, gathering supplies for sandwiches. “Surprised?”  
  
“Proud.”  
  
Neville stilled instantly.  
  
“I’m very proud of you, Neville.” Theo stood up even though he just sat down and made his way over to Neville, pressing his chest to Neville’s back, resting his chin on his shoulder. “So. Very. Proud.” He punctuated each pause with kiss to Neville’s neck.  
  
Neville’s hands covered Theo’s, running his fingertips along Theo’s hands. “Thank you.” Neville twisted around so they were facing each other and gathered Theo in his arms for a slow kiss. “I have a surprise for you.”  
  
Theo waited as Neville prepared their lunch, sandwiches for him and soup for Theo, then became confused as he set everything on a tray and sent it upstairs with a flick of his wand.  
  
‘’Ready?” Neville asked, taking Theo’s hand.  
  
They headed back to Neville’s bedroom, where Theo saw that he had setup a small table and two chairs outside on the balcony. It was a nice spring day, a light warm breeze in the air. Theo didn’t go out earlier this morning, just gazed at it from inside.  
  
“I can’t even remember what fresh air smells like anymore.” Theo whispered, his eyes filling with tears. “I forgot what wind and sunshine feels like on my skin. I can’t recall the smell of fresh grass.”  
  
“Would you like to find out?”  
  
Theo looked to Neville who held up a worn-out cardigan, waiting.  
  
“I know you’re cold.”  
  
Theo swallowed and slipped the sweater on, his skin tingling despite the two layers he was already wearing. Nothing Neville had picked for him really fit, so he grabbed some of Neville’s work out pants with a draw string waist and a sweatshirt. With nervous hands he stepped through the threshold of the house and into the warm air. He felt sunshine on his face, the brightness stinging his eyes.  
  
He loved it.  
  
“We can go for a walk when you feel up to it, if you’d like.” Neville said softly. “Or we can just sit outside.”  
  
Theo let his eyes focus and spotted a shop with an ice cream cone painted on the front window. A smile crossed his face. “We can definitely go for a walk.”  
  
They sat outside for nearly an hour, just talking. Theo learned that Neville was offered an Auror position right after Hogwarts, and he’s been doing a damn good job at it. He learned that Hermione and Ron were finally dating, it’s about damn time he remembered saying, making a laugh escape from Neville’s lips. Neville also told him that he, Harry and Hermione wrote the Azkaban reform bill. It was their main priority ever since Theo was taken away and Draco was sentenced. That Hermione became a lawyer and Ron took on so many extra cases so Harry and Neville could do this.  
  
Theo couldn’t wait to see the trio and thank them in person.  
  
Neville filled him in on what had happened in the world while Theo was gone. That Ginny was a professional Quidditch player now, and Luna traveled the world writing for the Quibbler. Pansy had met a nice French boy and moved to be with him, but kept in touch with Blaise, who Neville said became a writer. Hermione has both of his published works signed and displayed in her office.  
  
After their lunch Theo felt tired, too tired to go any farther than the bed, so that’s where he found himself hours later. Neville had propped himself up on a few pillows and was reading, running the fingers of his free hand through Theo’s hair.  
  
“Hello, there.” Neville smiled. “Feel better?”  
  
Theo didn’t feel as lethargic as he did yesterday, so he answered yes and sat up. “I feel hungry, too.”  
  
Neville beamed at him. “Do you? Well, I can fix that.”  
  
~~~~  
  
Neville felt complete as he watched Theo sleep. He let the last two years slip away as he ran his fingers through Theo’s soft hair. He released the constant tension in his jaw at the sight of his fluttering eyes. He let his heart mend as Theo pressed himself against him, staying as close as he possibly could.  
  
Theo was fragile, but he didn’t want to be. Neville could read him like a book, he always could. Neville was the only person other than Draco that he let himself be Theo around. Neville knew every single fear he had. He knew every hope, every dream, every sin. He knew he could help him heal; he was the only one that could.  
  
At dinner Neville felt such pride as he watched Theo slowly finish his small meal of rice and chicken. Neville was sure it was cold by the time Theo had gotten it all down, but he didn’t say anything about it. It didn’t matter. He would still insist that Theo take the potions Hannah left to help him along, but he was impressed with Theo’s progress already.  
  
He watched as Theo stared off, making Neville wonder what he was thinking about when his mind wandered. His face looked relaxed and calm, so Neville took the opportunity to take him in.  
  
“You’re so beautiful.” He blurted out.  
  
Theo’s eyes came back into focus, and he looked at Neville shyly. “I’m sorry, I got lost. What did you say?”  
  
He smiled warmly and reached his hand across the table. “I said that you’re beautiful.”  
  
Theo placed his hand in Neville’s, his cheeks flushing a lovely shade of pink. “I don’t understand how you can say those things when I look the way I do.”  
  
“I say those things because they’re true, Theo.” His other hand came to rest on top of Theo’s, his hand felt cold again. He didn’t like that Theo still felt so cold.  
  
Theo’s eyes flickered down to his left arm. “Are they?”  
  
“Yes.” He answered without hesitation.  
  
Theo withdrew his hand from Neville’s to rub his fingers along the now pink skin of his wrist.  
  
“Is it bothering you?”  
  
“Do you mean does it hurt? No.”  
  
Neville glared at it, knowing what lies beneath Theo’s sleeve. Those angry black marks on his skin had faded to a dull grey and didn’t look like they would scar at all. Neville was beyond grateful for that.  
  
“I hate them for that.” He said quietly. “I hate them for a lot of things, but especially that.”  
  
Theo finally looked to see what Neville was talking about. “It’s never been this bad before.”  
  
Neville looked at him in surprise. “You’ve done this more than once?”  
  
“Done what?”  
  
“They said that you attacked a guard.”  
  
Theo laughed harshly. “That’s one way of putting it.”  
  
Neville stood up to sit in the chair beside Theo and stilled his fingers that traced his skin. “Tell me what happened.”  
  
Theo just stared at his wrist, refusing to look at Neville. “It was the day Draco left. We had a cell inspection, and they took him away without any explanation. I lost it. I reached for him and I channeled some magic. It hurt so bad, Nev. I just...” Theo sniffed, trying to hold everything in. “I didn’t want him to go. How bad is that?”  
  
“Shh. It’s not bad at all. He’s your best friend. If he made it bearable then I’m glad you had him. Does that make me bad, too?”  
  
“Nothing could make me think badly about you. I think I’d like to take a shower.” He added before Neville could say anything more.  
  
“Of course.” Neville raised Theo’s hand and kissed his wrist. “Want to go ahead and I’ll get this cleaned up?”  
  
Theo nodded and gave a small smile. “You’ll come up when you’re done?”  
  
“The second I finish.” Neville assured.  
  
The cleanup from dinner didn’t take long at all, but he wanted to give Theo time to get started himself. Neville puttered around for a few minutes more, then went to his room and pulled out some sleep clothes for Theo to wear and some thick socks he thought he might appreciate. He heard the shower running, so enough time must have gone by.  
  
Neville knocked on the door three times then walked in.  
  
Theo stood straight up, half undressed, and perfectly still.  
  
“Theo? Babe?” Neville walked over and waved his hand in front of Theo’s face. He didn’t even blink. It was like Theo wasn’t even here. “Babe?”  
  
At a loss for what to do, Neville tossed the clothes he was holding onto the sink. He hadn’t seen Theo do something like this before; he struggled to take half a dozen stairs before he had to pause. Neville honestly didn’t know how Theo was keeping himself upright right now. He wasn’t blinking and was barely breathing.  
  
“Theo?” Neville asked, slightly louder. He laid his hand on Theo’s shoulder, and he felt the tremor that went through him. His eyes shot back to Theo’s face, and he saw it then. A barely quivering lip. A swallow of fear. Neville ran his hand down Theo’s arm and watched him shiver.  
  
Rage tried to overtake his concern, but he pushed it down. He would have plenty of time for that later. He removed his hands and heard the barely there sigh of relief.  
  
“Theo. You’re safe. You’re here with me. I won’t let anything happen to you.”  
  
He repeated comforting words until he saw a flash of recognition in his eyes.  
  
“Neville?” Theo croaked. His eyes shot around the room, confused again about his surroundings.  
  
“I’m here. It’s okay.”  
  
A shuttering breath escaped Theo as he slouched forward, enveloping himself in Neville’s embrace. “What happened?”  
  
“Cell inspection.”  
  
Neville didn’t understand. He paused trying to figure out what that had to do with anything. “Cell inspection?”  
  
Theo nodded slowly. “When the guards came in and beat us around, they called it cell inspection. When- when you...” He raised a fist and tapped Neville’s chest three times.  
  
Neville felt fucking terrible. “Christ, Theo. I’m so sorry.”  
  
“Three bangs on the wall.”  
  
“I didn’t know. Fuck, I’m so sorry.”  
  
“I would send my mind somewhere else; it was easier to deal with that way. Sometimes.”  
  
Neville wrapped his arms around him tightly, not wanting to let go.  
  
Theo stayed close to him for the rest of the evening, which was fine with him. Neville made notes in his mind of signs and behaviors to watch out for now, so he wouldn’t do something to send Theo back to that place again. When it was obvious that Theo was getting tired Neville clasped his hand with Theo’s and led him right passed the guest room and into his own room. His place was with Neville, and that’s where Theo would stay.  
  
He let Theo curl right up to him, stealing his warmth. He drew mindless circles on Neville’s chest with his fingertips. His breath ghosted across Neville’s skin. His leg slotted between Neville’s own, letting him feel the half hard erection Theo was not at all trying to hide.  
  
“Theo.” He breathed.  
  
He withdrew immediately. “I’m sorry.”  
  
“For what? You have nothing to be sorry for.”  
  
“You wanted to wait.”  
  
Neville wanted to scream and laugh at the same time. “Baby, I don’t want to wait at all. I want you to feel comfortable with anything we do.”  
  
Theo didn’t move or respond.  
  
Neville debated with himself for all of half a second before he rolled on top of Theo and kissed him. “Let me do the work tonight, yea? I want you. I’ve wanted you every single day for so long. Let me have you.”  
  
A low moan escaped Theo’s throat. “Please. I want nothing else more than I want you.”  
  
That was all Neville needed to hear. He poured years of want and need and fear and love into his kisses. He his hands roamed Theo’s body like he’d never touched it before, and in many ways, he hadn’t. He could feel every single one of Theo’s ribs. His collarbone jutted out, creating a dip in his skin that was just begging for attention. His legs were slimmer and less muscular.  
  
But, in many many ways, Neville knew every single fucking inch of Theo’s body. He knew exactly how Theo would shutter when Neville’s lips grazed his hips. He knew about the sensitive spot at the base of Theo’s neck. He knew how Theo’s fingers would feel woven in his hair. He knew that Theo liked it when Neville swirled his tongue around his nipples. He knew how Theo would taste. He knew the exact moment that Theo would let himself fall over the edge, spilling into Neville’s wanting mouth. He knew how much Theo liked it when he kissed his way back up to Theo’s lips.  
  
He knew it all.  
  
He knew how Theo’s breath would hitch when Neville took his hand in his and guided it down to enclose him. He knew that Theo would try to pull him even closer with his free hand. He knew that keeping his hand wrapped around Theo’s while Theo’s hand was wrapped around him would nearly have him screaming in bliss.  
  
He knew the tears that Theo was crying were out of love and gratitude and relief.  
  
He knew to kiss them away until Theo fell asleep in his arms.

* * *

  
  
Breakfast the next morning had Theo looking healthier and very well rested. Neville was pleased to see that the dark purple bags under his eyes were nearly gone, setting his mind at ease. Considering the state Theo was in six days ago he had no idea how long it would take for him to adjust. He wondered how often he slept while he was in Azkaban if he even slept at all. Neville guessed that he just shut his mind off rather than sleeping.  
  
His skin looked bright and he even had a slight shade of rosy pink to his cheeks. He couldn’t resist smiling at Theo as he ate a considerable bowl of fruit and yogurt. The way he savored every bite was both amusing and heartbreaking.  
  
“What are your plans for today?” Theo asked him.  
  
“To spend it with you.” Neville answered honestly.  
  
He’d restricted his floo last night so only a select few people could contact him. If it really was an emergency at work there were ways of getting a hold of him, hopefully making them think twice if Neville even had to be contacted in the first place. He never once tried to hide what Theo meant to him and was still more than a little pissed that he was never allowed to visit, not even once. He was taking this time off.  
  
They fucking deserved this.  
  
Neville did as he pleased throughout the day. If he felt like kissing Theo at random times that’s what he did. If while they were tending to the few plants Neville kept around the house the thought popped into his mind to smear Theo’s nose with dirt, that’s what he did. He asked Theo to read aloud to him. He covered him in lazy slow kisses while they lounged on the couch.  
  
They ate lunch on the balcony, and he watched unashamed as Theo soaked up the warm sun.  
  
He saw that Theo had been watching the ice cream parlor down the block and Neville smiled. “Do you want to go?”  
  
Theo’s attention snapped to Neville. “Out?”  
  
He flashed him a crooked playful smile. “Yes. To get some ice cream.”  
  
He watched Theo swallow, debating the idea. His eyes wandered back to the shop almost with longing.

“What are you thinking about?”  
  
“Do you think I can?”  
  
“Of course you can. Why wouldn’t you be able to?”  
  
“I don’t know the terms of my probation.”  
  
“Oh. Well, you’re not on probation.”  
  
“I don’t understand.”  
  
“Babe.” Neville intertwined their fingers, to make sure that he had Theo’s full attention. “You’re a free man.”  
  
Theo gaped at him. It was adorable, really.  
  
“How is that even possible? I assumed I had a life sentence since no one bothered to tell me otherwise.”  
  
Neville tried to push down his anger at that. “Your case, I still think it’s hilarious that they call it that, was reevaluated and they decided to compromise with time served. You paid heavily in restitution, but you’re a free man, in every sense of the word. No ministry checkups, no wand inspections, nothing.”  
  
“And Draco?”  
  
“Draco’s sentence was five years. He was released on probation due to the new reform bill.”  
  
Theo sat back, looking stunned. “Do I have any money left?”  
  
“Loads. You just... don’t have Nott Manor anymore. The ministry seized it. I’m sorry.” Neville had hoped to wait until he was sure Theo was stable enough for that news, but it came up now and he would never lie to him.  
  
Theo paused, thinking carefully. “It’s gone forever?”  
  
“I mean, you could buy it back, but I have no idea when that could happen.”  
  
A slow wide grin crossed Theo’s face. “That’s such a relief.”  
  
Neville tilted his head in confusion and surprise. “What?”  
  
“I hated that Manor. I’m glad it’s gone. And the only things that I would possibly miss I will learn to live without. I haven’t had them in years anyway.”  
  
“Well...” Neville grinned, making Theo look at him. “Ron was part of the team that was sent to search the place. He has your mother’s things. I told him what I could remember about your hiding places. Hermione boxed it all up and it’s in a spare room of theirs. She also saved I couldn’t even tell you how many books. In fact, I’m certain that she snuck over a few nights to get more before it was officially sealed off.  
  
Theo looked speechless. “They did all of that for me?”  
  
“Yes. They did.”  
  
Neville watched as a light seemed to shine from within his boyfriend. He seemed lighter and happier. He looked like a free man. No longer timid and unsure and scared. The words _you’re a free man_ seemed to settle deep within him and finally allow him to let go of it all.  
  
“Thank you.” Theo said finally. “I’d like to thank everyone personally. Sometime soon.”  
  
Neville gave his hand a squeeze. “Whenever you want. Harry says that Draco has been asking about you. He knows you were released.”  
  
Theo took a deep breath. “I’d like to see him first. If that’s alright.”  
  
“Of course it is. Now, about this ice cream.”  
  
Theo threw his head back and laughed, then looked at him with nothing but love in his eyes. It made Neville’s heart stop.  
  
“I think you’re the one that wants the ice cream, love.”

* * *

  
  
Later in the afternoon they stepped out onto the front steps of the townhouse, hand in hand. Neville was so proud of Theo; he couldn’t even describe it. He knew he was nervous, but also desperate to step outside. As if he didn’t believe he was really allowed until Neville had told him that he could.  
  
People passed them on the street and offered kind smiles. Theo averted his eyes every time, but Neville greeted them as they walked by.  
  
“Neville! Is that you?”  
  
“Yes, ma’am.” Neville answered with a bright smile.  
  
He pulled Theo along with him to the elderly woman standing on the steps a few houses down. She was an eccentric woman that didn’t give a damn about what others thought of her. Today, for instance, she had on striped neon leg warmers over her bright blue leggings and worn-out sneakers. Her baggy faded grey cardigan that had deep pockets for her cigarettes and keys that contained about two dozen key chains. Her blonde hair that was slowly turning grey was tied back with an eye blinding pink scrunchie. Her coke bottle glasses, and wide smile made Neville adore her even more.  
  
“Cut the ma’am, shit.”  
  
Neville laughed. “Habit, Cheryl.”  
  
“Who’s that with you? Hmm?” She waddled down the steps and met them on the sidewalk, staring up at Theo.  
  
“Cheryl, this is Theo. My boyfriend.”  
  
Theo’s lips twitched nervously, and Neville wondered if he’d ever met a muggle face to face. “Hello.”  
  
“Oh! This is your Theo, eh?” She squealed. “Handsome boy. How was living abroad, my dear?”  
  
Neville choked on air, not expecting that question.  
  
Theo grinned, like he was greatly amused by the wicked secret. “Life changing.”  
  
“Here to stay now? Neville yammers on about you daily!” She drawled, as if she were ever annoyed with their chats.  
  
“Cheryl!”  
  
Theo looked at him and chuckled. “Yes, I plan on staying quite a while.”  
  
“Good, good. Gotta run now, time to get the kiddos!” She reached up and patted Theo’s cheek, then looked at Neville. “Handsome man.”  
  
“So you’ve said.” Neville reminded her.  
  
“Well I’m saying it again! Bring him round for cookies!” She called as she made her way down the street in the opposite direction.  
  
“I like her.” Theo said as he stared after her.  
  
“I do, too.” Neville pulled Theo along and they began walking again. “There’s a preschool a few blocks away, she’s a bus driver.” At Theo’s confused face Neville searched for an analogy. “Like, you know how the thestrals pulled the carriages from the station to Hogwarts? Cheryl would be the one directing them and making sure all of the kids got where they needed to go.”  
  
Theo nodded, seeming to understand. “So, you’ve talked about me?”  
  
Neville felt his cheeks flush. “All the time. Cheryl lets me go on about you for hours sometimes. There were nights when she’d see my light on and she’d walk over with a plate of cookies. We’d sit on the front steps and I’d talk about my boyfriend that was a million miles away, and she’d talk about Francis, her husband that passed on some years ago. He was a grumpy man from what I’ve gathered, but she adored him. I needed those nights more than she will ever know.”  
  
“Now I think I love her.”  
  
Neville leaned over and kissed Theo’s temple. The fact that he could do that whenever he wanted made his chest ache with years of suppressed passion.  
  
The ice cream shop was fairly empty, so they took their time looking over the chalkboard menu. Theo chose mint chocolate chip, while Neville got a banana split. He always did have a sweet tooth. He could see that Theo was getting tired and wanted to sit, but Neville had one more thing he wanted to do first, so he led them across the street to the park.  
  
“That’s just sugar disguised as a desert with a banana thrown in.” Theo criticized.  
  
Neville snorted. “Compared to your toothpaste chocolate? I’ll take this any day.”  
  
“I don’t know where you get toothpaste from.”  
  
“Because mint is for toothpaste and toothpaste only. Unless it’s in one of those little candies they give you at restaurants.”  
  
Theo threw hand in the air dramatically. “That’s exactly what this is! Only in the form of ice cream.”  
  
Neville took a huge spoonful of his sundae. “Is not.”  
  
“You know what? I’m making you taste it. Right now.”  
  
Neville jogged away. “I’m not going anywhere near that.”  
  
Theo huffed but followed Neville over to a picnic table that was situated by itself near a fountain. He seemed grateful to finally be able to rest, making Neville feel bad, but he knew the surprise would be worth it.  
  
And it was right on cue.  
  
“Theo?”  
  
Theo’s head snapped up so fast at the sound of Draco’s voice. “Draco!”  
  
He leapt up and collided into him, his arms wrapping around Draco’s neck tightly. He pulled away to cup his face, his watery eyes glued to the man in front of him.  
  
“He’s been asking about him every day.”  
  
Neville turned to see Harry standing next to him, a sappy smile plastered on his face. “Theo needed him. I couldn’t wait any longer.”  
  
Theo turned back and saw Neville and Harry, giddy with emotion.  
  
“Go on, catch up. We’ll give you some space.” Neville said to them.  
  
Theo and Draco sat at a table a few rows away, sharing Theo’s disgusting ice cream. They were pressed so close to each other, and every once in a while, Theo would reach up and touch his face, almost like he had to be absolutely sure Draco was real.  
  
“How’s he doing?” Neville asked Harry, who ended up stealing half of his sundae.  
  
“Better.” Harry answered confidently. “It was a rough few days in the beginning, but we had a lot of shit to work out between us first.”  
  
Neville nodded in understanding. He remembered the first time that Harry told him he had feelings for Draco, and about the secret kiss they shared just before Draco’s trial. He didn’t understand it then, but he didn’t have to. Harry’s feelings were his own and he would never judge Harry for who he loved. After Harry explained it all to him, it began to make sense. He even told him all the times that Theo said Draco asked about Harry back in Hogwarts.  
  
“How’s Theo doing? He looks good.”  
  
Neville turned his attention back to his boyfriend. “He’s amazing. He’s been so great, Harry. He gets frustrated, but he’s made so much progress already.”  
  
“Draco’s mood shifts like mad.” Harry confessed. “He’s getting better, but sometimes I get so frustrated.”  
  
“I think that’s just who you both are, though.” Neville said to him. “Always pushing each other’s buttons.”  
  
Harry smirked. “Makes for amazing make up sex.”  
  
Neville laughed at him. “I bet it does.” He watched them for a few minutes more, thinking about Theo’s wandering mind. “Does Draco... lose track of time easily?”  
  
“No. In fact he’s painfully aware of every minute of the day. He times everything.”  
  
Neville wasn’t expecting that. “Does he really?”  
  
Harry nodded. “Said the same thing you just did about Theo oddly enough. He wanted to be there when Theo came back down, and the habit just became his daily life. He still does it, then?”  
  
“All the time.” Neville confessed. “I’m beginning to tell when it’s a good thing and when he’s trapped though. I fucked up last night, and spent the night trying to make it up to him. Did Draco tell you about the cell inspections?”  
  
Harry jaw set itself into a hard line, and Neville had his answer. “That’s what came up last night.” Neville told him.  
  
“Draco’s told me a lot about what goes on in there. We have a lot of fucking work to do.”  
  
Neville looked at his friend in complete admiration, then looked at Theo and Draco. “Yes, we do. When are you going back?”  
  
Harry shrugged. “Haven’t thought about it. Hermione wants me into politics when I do decide though. I must agree with her. There’s so many things I want to change and being an Auror won’t let me do that.”  
  
Neville thought back to how hard they worked just to accomplish what they had. “Agreed.”  
  
Harry looked over and grinned. “Glad you’re on board.”  
  
“Did I say that? I’m not a politician, Harry.”  
  
“I’m not asking you to run for Minister.”  
  
“No, that’s your job.”  
  
“You sound like Hermione.”  
  
“Because I’m right.”  
  
Harry huffed, but didn’t deny it. “Think about it. I want you with me on this, Nev.”  
  
Neville sat a moment, just watching and thinking. They couldn’t have achieved any of this without the other. “Give me a month.”  
  
Harry beamed at him, then looked over to watch Theo and Draco as well. Harry always did wear his heart on his sleeve. “I’ll give you two.”

* * *

  
  
Later that night Neville watched Theo as he smiled to himself. He was lost in his mind again, but Neville wasn’t worried this time. Whatever he was thinking about made him happy. It had been an eventful day, and he could see that Theo was a pleasant kind of exhausted.  
  
“What are you thinking about over there?” He asked as he sat down on the couch with their tea and a blanket.  
  
Theo looked up and blushed, realizing that he’d been daydreaming again. “You. Thank you, Nev.”  
  
Neville still couldn’t believe that Theo was his. “You’re welcome. You know, Harry only lives a few streets away; just on the other side of the park. You can see Draco anytime you want.”  
  
“I didn’t realize how good it would feel to see his face. To be able to touch any part him. To be able to feel him in person instead of around a stone wall.”  
  
Neville couldn’t even imagine what that must have been like. What kind of torture that was to have your best friend right next you but unable to see him. “Well, like I said. Anytime you want. Harry’s place is always open.”  
  
Theo twisted himself around on the couch to lean his back against Neville’s chest as he draped the blanket over Theo’s legs. He felt cold again, so Neville wrapped his arm around him to offer him his body heat.  
  
“I um,” Neville stammered. “I do have something for you.”  
  
He twisted around and reached for his wand to summon a narrow box over to them. He knew that Theo knew exactly what it was when it gently landed in his lap. He watched Theo’s shaky fingers lift the lid of the box and brush them along his sleek wood of his wand.

“It’s yours. You’re allowed to use it.” Neville said softly.  
  
“It feels...” He picked it up and held it in his hand. He licked his lips and took a steadying breath, then raised he wand like he was born with it in his hand and levitated a vase a few inches into the air, then gracefully floated it back down. He turned to face Neville with the brightest smile.  
  
Neville had never felt so fucking proud.  
  
~~~~  
  
Theo felt better every day that he woke up in Neville’s arms. Their mornings were filled with lazy kisses and subtle touches that explored places they longed to feel for nearly two years. Theo tried to stay awake longer each day, but most times still fell asleep right after lunch. Neville read to him and played with his hair while he rested on the couch or in their bed.  
  
Their bed.  
  
He always smiled when his mind thought of things like that.  
  
Their bed. Their home. Their life.  
  
He wasn’t sure he’d ever had a better thought. Well, he did have one other that might just beat that one out. He turned his head where it was resting against Neville’s chest. He loved these quiet moments that they had at the end of the day. “I believe I’m ready for bed.”  
  
“I am, too.” Neville said as he threw the stack of files Harry had brought over earlier that week onto the coffee table. Neville had been going over them for days now; even letting Theo read through them to make sure he was understanding everything. He knew that Neville going back to work would be one hell of an adjustment, but they’d talked about it, and they were ready.  
  
Theo stood and waited for Neville to take his hand and lead him upstairs, like he did every night. With their evening routines complete, Theo crawled into bed and pressed himself against Neville’s side, as always. Neville’s arms wound around him, breathing him in, as always.  
  
But tonight would be different.  
  
He had plans for tonight.  
  
He let his fingers trace Neville’s skin slowly, ghosting exactly the right places. Neville often slept shirtless now that the weather had gotten warmer, and Theo in only a t shirt and boxers. It made not being strong enough to make love to Neville excruciating. He kissed Neville’s chest with featherlight kisses and full wet lips. He licked his way from one nipple to the other, immensely enjoying the little gasps Neville couldn’t control.  
  
“Theo.” He moaned.  
  
God, how long he waited to hear Neville say his name like that again. Like he was the only thing in the world that mattered. “Yes?”  
  
“That feels good.”  
  
“Yes.” Theo purred. “Yes, it does.”  
  
Neville moaned as Theo’s teeth grazed his skin tugging a nipple into his mouth. His fingers tangled in Theo’s hair, silently begging for him not to stop. He smirked; he had no plans in stopping anytime soon.  
  
Neville tried to sit up, to take over Theo was sure, but he didn’t want that tonight.  
  
“No. Tonight, I want you. All of you.”  
  
“Are- are you sure?”  
  
Theo rose on his knees to straddle him, throwing his own shirt to the floor then kissing his way up Neville’s body. He let his lips brush across Neville’s as he spoke. “Very. I’m ready. And I will have you.”  
  
They’d been leading up to this moment for the last few weeks. Touching, groping, sucking and licking every part of each other that Theo couldn’t wait any longer. He kept his kisses slow and teasing, being as seductive as he possibly could. He wanted this to last. He kissed Neville he was grinding up against Theo’s hips and his hands were roaming his body erratically.  
  
“I never let myself think about you like this.” Theo whispered as he slithered down Neville’s body. “Not once.”  
  
He dipped his tongue into Neville’s belly button, then followed that perfect trail of hair down to Neville’s waiting erection.  
  
He avoided it, making Neville groan.  
  
“Did you think about me?” Theo asked him. Kissing his way across Neville’s hips.  
  
“Yes. All the time.” He breathed.  
  
“What things did you think of me doing? Hmm?” Theo smiled as Neville’s cock bobbed eagerly, but Theo still wasn’t touching it. He wasn’t even close to giving it the attention it so rightfully deserved.  
  
“Your mouth, your fingers. Touching me, stretching me.”  
  
“Did you do it yourself? Wishing it were me?”  
  
Theo knew he was playing with fire. He knew how close Neville was to coming undone already, but he couldn’t help it. A blissed out, incoherent Neville was the only thing Theo wanted right now.  
  
“Yes. Yes.” Neville jerked his hips up, attempting to prove his point.  
  
Theo moved out of the way, denying the friction Neville was so desperately seeking. “You want me to touch you, baby?” He licked the skin at the base of Neville’s cock, nearly coming undone himself at the noises Neville was making.  
  
“Fuck, Theo. Please.”  
  
Neville gripped the sheets at his sides, trying to behave. Theo grinned that he remembered how to play the game.  
  
Then he swallowed him whole.  
  
The harsh intake of breath that Neville pulled into his lungs was so fucking worth it. Theo pinned his hips down with his hands, sucking him off at such a brutal pace Neville had to lock his hands together above his head to keep from touching Theo.  
  
Neville hated not being able to touch him. So much that he loved it.  
  
Theo loved being touched by him, so much that he forbids Neville to do it.  
  
Not until they were both so far gone that it they couldn’t stand it.  
  
With Neville’s cock still filling his mouth he reached up and pushed his fingers into Neville’s mouth. He sucked on them greedily, ready for what was to come. Theo let Neville fall from his mouth, all while making eye contact with him. It was the single most erotic thing he’d ever felt. The hungry look in Neville’s eyes was always too much for him. It hit him like a speeding train, every fucking time.  
  
Withdrawing his now spit covered fingers he wandlessly summoned the lube from the bathroom. Despite the moment, he caught the pride in Neville’s eyes. His first attempts and using wandless magic sent him to a flinching panic, but Neville was a patient man and stuck with him until he had mastered the few spells he knew of once again.  
  
Touching his fingers to Neville’s entrance was euphoric. So far, he hadn’t allowed himself to play there, saving the piece of Neville he wanted most for this night. Neville seemed to understand this and never pushed or asked for more. He willingly gave Theo his body every night in anyway Theo wanted it and Theo gladly returned the favor. His fingertips danced around but never entered, only pushing and teasing. Theo’s other hand moved in slow, excruciating strokes up and down Neville’s cock. The string of words Neville mumbled were barely words at this point. Theo smiled to himself, Neville’s was almost there.  
  
Finally pushing two fingers inside forced a whine deep from Theo’s throat as Neville cried out. He was damn near over stimulated and Theo himself had been barely touched, but it felt so good.  
  
“Almost, baby.” He promised. “Almost there.”  
  
Neville’s arms were shaking from the restraint he was forcing upon himself, his legs tense and wide open. Still, Theo played. He caressed and fondled and _pressed._ First with two fingers, then with three. Neville’s cock was dripping with want and need and Theo couldn’t help but lick the tip clean of precome.  
  
“Please! Please, please, please!” Neville begged; his face twisted into fucked out madness.  
  
Theo withdrew his fingers at once and lubed up his dick quicker than Neville had finished his sentence. With a single thrust Theo was finally, blissfully, completely inside Neville. His rock hard cock quivering with the feel of him.  
  
“Touch me. Touch me please.”  
  
Neville didn’t have to be told twice. He lunged forward and grabbed Theo by the hair, yanking him down to crash their lips together. His hands were a frenzied mess all over Theo’s body. Theo pounded into him, harsh and unforgiving, pouring years of his own want and need and love and loneliness and devotion into this single moment.  
  
“Come for me, baby.” Theo demanded.  
  
And Neville did. Cock untouched.  
  
Theo lasted three more thrusts before he was spilling himself inside Neville.  
  
Theo rested his forehead against Neville’s as he tried to bring himself down from the high. He didn’t even realize that he was crying until he felt Neville’s gentle fingers wipe a tear away. Theo opened his eyes to see Neville’s bright shiny ones staring back at him.  
  
“I love you.”  
  
Neville cupped his cheek. This was the first time he’d said it out loud.  
  
“I love you, too.”  
  
They fell asleep holding each other close, exchanging languid kisses and gentle brushes of skin on skin.  
  


* * *

  
  
**10 Years Later**  
  
Theo walked the halls of the ministry, his expensive shoes clicking against the marble floors as he walked.  
  
“I’m telling you,” Draco said to him, keeping up with his pace easily. “Hermione will have your ass if you don’t get her those files in time. You’re screwed either way, really.”  
  
Theo chucked at his friend. “You think so?”  
  
Draco shook his head, pressing the call button for the lift once they stepped up to it. “That Hermione will kill you if we don’t make that deadline? Yes, absolutely.”  
  
Theo thumbed the file in his hand again. This project was his baby. It was what made him want to get into politics in the first place. It’s what made him join Harry’s campaign for Minister.  
  
The Azkaban reform bill. It needed to be reworked, it had gone too long without review, and it was important to Theo that it be completely redone. Hermione had a hell of a workload with being the head of the Wizengamot, and also seven months pregnant. Theo often wondered how she did it all.  
  
The lift opened and they were met with a smiling Ron Weasley.  
  
“Oh for heaven’s sake.” Draco grumbled.  
  
“Oi, getting in the lift or what?”  
  
Theo smirked and yanked on Draco’s elbow, enjoying the fact that he completely lost his balance and stumbled into the lift crashing right into Ron.  
  
“Didn’t know you felt that way about me, Malfoy.” Ron quipped as he pulled Draco upright. “Too late though, should’ve told me years ago.”  
  
“Why would I want the cheap excuse for Harry when I can have the real thing?” Draco smirked as he straightened his suit.  
  
Ron barked out a genuine laugh. “Remind me again why he married you?”  
  
Draco opened his mouth to speak but Theo cut him off.  
  
“No one wants to know about your sex life, Draco.”  
  
Ron visibly shuttered. “That’s true. Keep that shit to yourself, please and thanks.”  
  
“Anyway.” Draco drawled. “Like I said, she’ll never go for it. It’s too damn close to her due date and you keep stalling. Plus it’s an election year.”  
  
Theo rolled his eyes. “As if his approval ratings aren’t the highest out of any Minister we’ve ever had.”  
  
Draco adjusted his tie needlessly. “You never know.”  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. “Sometimes it’s disgusting how much you love him.”  
  
When the lift stopped, they were at **Level One: Minister for Magic and Support Staff.**  
  
Theo never grew bored of reading that. Ever. He was the Senior Undersecretary to the Minister for Magic. Draco was his Special Advisor. Ron climbed the ladder all the way up to the Head of the DMLE. And Harry, of course, was the Minister for Magic and had been for the last five years.  
  
He’d found his calling, and he couldn’t be happier. He was a respected and acknowledged. He wore his sleeves rolled up daily and not a single person cared. He had a shiny gold band on his finger. His life was perfect.  
  
The three of them walked into Harry’s office unannounced and went to their usual places. Theo stood by his desk, Ron flopped on the couch and Draco took his chair behind the massive desk.  
  
“No, I’ve already told you that I’m not budging on this.” Harry barked into the floo as he paced the room. He looked up and nodded at his guests, then went back to arguing with the French Minister. “If you want the Tri-Wizard Tournament resurrected I will personally be running point or Hogwarts will not be participating.  
  
Theo glanced at Draco in time catch his eye roll. Why these people even bothered to argue with Harry fucking Potter was beyond them.  
  
“Unless you change your mind, Sir, there’s really nothing left to discuss. You’ve be made aware of my stance several times. If there’s nothing else, this meeting has run late and now I’m terribly late for my next engagement.” Harry shut down the floo before the French Minister could even respond. Harry walked right over to Draco, grabbed him by the tie and kissed him. “Hello, love.”  
  
“Oi!” Ron shouted at them, tossing a pillow in their direction. “We’re still on the clock!”  
  
“Oh dear, “ A voice from the doorway said to them. “even though it’s well after five?”  
  
Theo whipped around to see Neville standing there, holding a toddler in his arms.  
  
“Uncle Theo! Uncle Theo!” The little girl wiggled out of Neville’s arms and ran to him, crashing into him full force.  
  
“Oof. Hello, Rose.” Theo picked her up and made his way over to Neville to give him a quick kiss.  
  
“Daddy’s here, too.” Ron pouted.  
  
Rose giggled. “Hi, daddy!”  
  
Ron visibly melted. “Hello, Sweetie.”  
  
“Figured you lot would be done by now.” Neville smiled. “So I stopped and picked her up from the Burrow.”  
  
Ron glanced at his watch and raised his eyebrows. “You made damn good time then. Mom didn’t send you home with twelve dozen cookies?”  
  
“Oh she did.” Neville laughed. “Thinks we’ve been deprived ever since Cheryl passed away.”  
  
“Damn, I miss that woman.” Theo sighed. She was his first ever muggle friend, and he adored her.  
  
“Language around my daughter, please.” Hermione scolded as she waddled into the room.  
  
“Daddy said the bad word first!” Rose squealed, making Draco bark out a laugh.  
  
“I can’t win here!” Ron grumbled, but clearly wasn’t bothered.  
  
“How’s Hogwarts fairing, Neville?” Hermione asked as she kissed Rose on the cheek, then dry ungraciously flopped on the couch next to Ron, putting her feet in his lap.  
  
“Wonderful.” He groaned. “Finals are always a stressful time.”  
  
“Soon you’ll have the entire summer to do nothing but lounge around if you want to, babe.” Theo said brightly. “You won’t have to look at another sheet of paper until the syllabus is due.”  
  
“Speaking of sheets of paper.” Neville oh so subtly said with a nod to the file still in Theo’s hand.  
  
“Is that it?!” Hermione demanded. “Hand it over.”  
  
“I’m not sure if-“  
  
“Theo.” Harry said, cutting him off. “You’ve gone over every word of that bill for the last year. It’s solid. Just give it to her.”  
  
“And if Draco’s right and it’s not the right time and it gets shot down?” He questioned. “This is really important to me.”  
  
“It’ important to all of us.” Hermione told him. “If I can’t pitch it, which I can, and they veto it, which they won’t, we’ll just try again next year. When have we ever given up if the first try didn’t work?”  
  
Theo knew she was right. He needed to relax.  
  
“Give yourself some of the damn credit, Theo.”  
  
“Draco!” Hermione chastised.  
  
Draco blew her a kiss. “Do you honestly think this administration has done as well as it has solely because of Harry? He needs you, Theo.”  
  
Harry didn’t bother to deny it. “He’s not wrong.”  
  
With a deep breath Theo walked over and handed the file to Hermione. He went to stand beside Neville, who immediately wrapped an arm around his waist.  
  
“I’m so proud of you.” Neville whispered.  
  
Theo never tired of hearing Neville say those words.  
  
“Alright.” Neville said with enthusiasm. “Who’s ready for ice cream?”  
  
“Me, Uncle Neville!” Rose screamed. “Me!”  
  
Ron snorted. “Thank Godric that she’s spending the weekend with you if you plan on giving her that much sugar.”  
  
“Well we better get going then!” Theo said to Rose. “Before the shop runs out of ice cream.”  
  
Rose gasped dramatically, then wiggled out of his arms and ran to her parents to give them kisses, signaling that she was ready to go. Right now.  
  
“Is there anything more you need from me, Harry?”  
  
Draco shook his head affectionately. “Get out of here already. We’ll be right behind you.”  
  
“Damn right we will.” Harry agreed. “I want ice cream, too.”  
  
Hermione groaned. “I give up!”  
  
Neville kissed his temple as he held in a laugh. “Ready, babe?”  
  
Theo turned to face him, even more in love with him now than he ever was. “Let’s go.”  
  
Rose jumped with joy then ran down the hall towards the lift. Theo took Neville’s hand in his and walked proudly down the hall alongside him. He used to keep track of days, then he kept track of moments.

Now, he simply lived.


End file.
